Reduce Stress and Increase Energy with Your Point of View!


Defending your point of view can use up a lot of your precious energy. As much as 90% of our available energy can be used in this way.

If you do this a lot, stop doing it and see for yourself. You'll probably feel energised, not to mention liberated.

Sometimes it's necessary to 'defend your view'. If someone is trying to persuade you to do something you don't want to do either walk away or say the minimum. Such as "No."

People respect a simple "no", as long as it's said with conviction. Or you can be polite and say "No thanks". Just leave out the "No, but..." as this leaves an opening for the persuader to get back in to try and 'convince' you.

An example is that an ex-partner always wanted me to go skiing. I hated it but he was always trying to persuade me of its merits. This resulted in many tiring arguments where I defended my views on why I disliked it and he defended his views on why he did.

It was exhausting, I felt as if I was in court and had to come up with a good reasons not to ski!

Finally I realised that all it took was a simple, but emphatic "No". He skied, while I enjoyed the apres ski without the ski...bliss!

If you're not defending your right not to do something that you don't want it's even easier. As soon as defending your view stops being pleasant then just stop.

I can remember a huge row that divided a group I met on holiday. It began as a lightheartded chat about a particular movie. It soon became a heated row. The people who liked it thought there must be something wrong with the people who didn't. And vice versa.

I'm not going to say what the movie was, I don't want to start another row! However, I arrived on the beach the next day day to find them all 'fuming' about this ongoing disagreement. They asked if I'd liked the movie. Actually I'd loathed it, but said it just hadn't appealed to me, and I hadn't really thought about why....

I wasn't going to say another thing...I'd learned by too many mistakes.

If they'd asked me in the heat of the row it would have been wise to say I hadn't seen it! After all, whatever they thought or said would not change the fact I hadn't liked it.

That's the crucial point. Nothing anyone said would have changed my experience of that film. People's views are more often changed by experience, rather than persuasion.

It doesn't matter if it's ice-creams, cars, clothes, holidays, that are being discussed.

You know what you like, you know what you don't like. And that's enough. The more we respect the point of view of others the more they respect ours.

Janet trained as a Professional Stress Consultant. She owns the website http://www.womens-natural-health.com which offers lots of free tips for enhancing your health, happiness and beauty.

MORE RESOURCES:
RELATED ARTICLES
Minimize Stress in Your Life
Use these simple tips to minimize stress in your day to day living.Lower your expectations and you will suffer less disappointment.
It is Looking Up for Stress Relief
No this is not related to praying, this is how your brain works. Looking up will reduce your stress?.
Easy Elimination Of Worry & Stress!
It is very true that, unfortunately, many people look to reduce feelings of worry and stress by doing the very things that, ultimately, bring on more of the same. Alcohol, drugs, and over indulgence in the wrong types of food all seem to offer an immediate solution to get away from the stresses of the day.
Stress Management: How to Change Limiting Beliefs
Mark Twain once said, "It's not what we don't know that hurts us. It's what we know that isn't so.
Control Stress with High Morale
When Army leaders fail to control battlefield stress, they lose as many soldiers to combat stress as they do to enemy bullets. Even when they are well trained, these soldiers are more likely to collapse in the face of great stress.
Stress Relief in Minutes
For those who are suffering from stress, just about the hardest thing to find is stress relief. Stress can often continue itself on its own energy and, as it mounts up upon itself, it builds itself into an absolute mental frenzy.
Journal Your Stress Away
Writing down our thoughts and feelings, as in keeping a journal or diary, is a proven method to relieve stress and improve well being. The expression achieved through writing in a journal on a regular basis, or during times of high stress, helps to clarify and focus what we are actually feeling and experiencing.
Managing Stress
Do you ever feel stressed? Is stress a regular component of your lifestyle? What exactly is stress? What causes it and what can you do to manage and reduce it?What you experience as stress is the result of your reaction to the events, circumstances, and people you encounter. The more you feel frustrated, a victim, helpless, a target, or picked on, the more you feel stressed.
5 Steps to Make Stress Your Best Friend
You probably think I'm wacko, but it's true - stress can be your best friend! Stress is actually a positive experience to be channeled to improve your life.For instance, let me tell you about a small moment of stress I faced a few minutes ago.
Permission to Play
At what age does the benefit of play cease? Child development experts agree that play is very important in the learning and emotional development of all children. But do we ever grow out of a need for play? I answer with an emphatic no.
Dealing with Workplace Stress
One of the hardest forms of stress to avoid is workplace stress. After all, you need to go to work and there are plenty of things to worry about once you get there.
Stress- What Is It?
Whenever we think of 'stress', negative thoughts come into our minds. Most of us believe that stress is similar to worries, tensions, failures, sadness, pressures, and what not.
What The Most Dangerous Job In The World Taught Me About Coping With Stress
I just got through reading some troubling news in the New York Times this morning.62% of employees now say that work-related stress leaves them overwhelmed and overtired.
Instant Relaxation Anytime Anywhere
If there was a way of relaxing quickly and easily in any situation would you want to know what it is?Ancient cultures knew this secret, and followers of Hawaiian Huna used it to access altered states. In more recent times martial artists used it as a way to develop relaxed alertness, and today photoreaders use it to relax before reading books at speeds of 25,000 words per minute.
7 Tips to Help You De-stress & Handle Your Problems
Life would be so wonderful if it weren't for other people. Let's face it, people will upset you.
Energy - How to Have More of It
Something the successful business person needs is - lots of Energy! You need Brain Energy and you need Body Energy. However as with any other kind of energy, it's constantly being drained away and needs replacing.
Inner Space
Every woman needs her own personal space for relaxation, not only to release us from the stress cycle but also to restore us so that we can reassume our responsibilities calmly and with deepened insight.Try and make time everyday for at least half an hour to recharge your batteries.
Dont Let Technology Psych You Out!
We've all experienced it-computerized technology that doesn't function properly. PCs that crash on Monday morning, copiers that melt transparencies, printers that smear ink on Board reports, phones that crackle during crisis calls, Internet viruses that destroy everything but non-essential data, faxes that send documents to the wrong long distance number, and so forth.
Stress Management and Mastery: 5 Tips for Positive Anger Management
A grandfather, whose grandson came to him angry at a schoolmate who had done him an injustice, said,"I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those who have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down and doesn't hurt your enemy.
Do You Have Your Foot On The Pedal? Are You Overwhelmed At Work?
Is your in-tray or inbox full? I don't normally check the time that emails are sent to me, but for some reason I noticed that Nadia's message had been sent at 2am. In her email she explained that she really needed some help, to deal with all the stress in her life:This morning I rushed out of the house before the kids got up.